|
|
May 18, 2004 #
Happy Birthday Tina Fey, I mean it I cursed myself and I deserve what I'm getting now. Perhaps the Gawker server problems I'm still going through which leave me without the ability to submit a post are due to the horrible Tina Fey joke I made on the first day. I regret that and I should have known better. By way of penance, let me share an innocent story from my youth. As a 10 year old I loved eating hard-boiled eggs. I was Cool Hand Luke in training. I usually boiled eggs in water for 15 minutes to reach the desired hardness. One day I glanced over at the microwave and thought I could achieve the same results in a couple minutes. Life was pretty fast back then too and ways to cut corners were always helpful. At the time I only knew you couldn't put aluminum in a microwave. Unfortunately for me, heating the egg on high worked... almost. I reached for the egg and while it was hotter than molten lava it seemed in perfect condition. I peeled while running it under cold water. So far, so good though it was still hot as blazes. I then start to take a nibble, then a second little bite, not bad, but on my third...BOOM! Motherfuckin' egg BLEW UP IN MY FACE! It was like a goddamn grenade. I had burns all over my face and I was crying unholy terror. My mom took me to the doctor and they lathered my face with aloe vera. It was nothing serious except I had to go to swim team practice the next day. The stinging pain of stupidity is rarely felt as strong as chlorinated water on flesh wounds. Archives "The Other Page" powered by Removable Hype. RSS. Copyright © 2003 La Otra Página, Inc. All nights observed. Feel free to email "info(at)krucoff.com" for questions, comments, stock tips, and family gossip. |
