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December 1, 2003. "The Other Page" welcomes your visit like parents in town for the weekend. We sincerely hope, which is just short of pledging, to update this site WeekDaily (M-F). Your captain will be Andrew Krucoff with very little, albeit important, help from Chris Gage. Plenty of turbulence and crew attitude are in the forecast. If nothing else, they are united by the unflinching pursuit of fashion models and A-frame cars from the 70s, cheap and quasi-legal fun, tormenting themselves and other people.

They wear New York City on their sleeves, Connecticut around their necks, and Jersey in their pants. They chronicle the lives of "Young Manhattanites" clawing the wrong way to the top and their stupid friends who try to eat it all in one bite. Their business and social networks are the clusterfucks you might imagine discarding terry-cloth robes while spilling brown liquor on each other around Hef's Grotto during the 80's L.A. metal scene's hair-and-hey day.

They were home schooled and potty mouth trained by the best divorce lawyers trust fund money can buy. They studied under MacKaye, Mamet, Vonnegut, and Van Halen. In their Billy Childish Adult years, marketable off-shore skills were honed in Jupiter Research's world-renounced Mentor Program which sent many a young bird flying to exotic locales such as iVillage, NYT Digital, CNNfn, The Unemployment Line Inc, and oddly Columbia's Poct-Bac Med program. But the wings of Krucoff and Gage spanned much further like plus-sizes. After two years and acceptance letters from Wharton, Kellogg, and HBS in hand they did what any smart player would do holding an off-suit Ace and 5 in the pre-flop betting round. They went all in and roadied for a friend's band on a 3-month tour of Canada, the American West and South.

All of this is revealed to give you the unique perspective from which they pour buckets of mind-numbing solvents down their gullets in an effort to spit it back up onto these pages for you. To this end, they've developed a patent-pending formula for writing excessfully:

(Bad Punning + Metaphor Mixing + Indiscriminate Bolding)*LES Neighbor Bashing/(Gawker Obsessing - Kicker Baiting) = Buttloads of CollegeHumor.com Traffic

Of course, everything written on these pages is purely fictional and influenced by the use of hardcore recreational drugs. Dig it. Dig in.